Flappy Bird Dies
by YFIQ
Summary: Again and again until it finally tries to stand up to its misery!


One day, a pair of jezzball broke through the barrier and enters a game about crushing candies.

Knowing how the balls are known for its destructive tendencies, each of the crunchy sweets tries to avoid the pair of red and white balls, only to get struck without a shred of mercy.

But then a flapping bird flies right in and said, "Hey guys, I got lost and could really use a direction to get back home...so any one of you talking candies help me how to get back to Vietnam?"

But then a ball came and hits the bird in the face.

"OW! What gives?" the bird shouts.

However, the two balls aren't in any mood to answer as they proceed to attack the bird as one of them pins him to the floor while other bounce on its head repeatedly. Once it was over, all what was left of the bird is a pile of feather covered red mush.

The candies looks on as the two balls continues to bounce on the must that was once a bird that happened to be unfortunate enough to flap right in.

Then, someone got onto the computer and traps the two ball in a tiny space, blacking out the majority of the area. It looked as if the situation have finally came to its merciful end when suddenly, the screen came back to the way it was but this time...there's three balls bouncing all over the screen. The balls chased after the resurrected bird while the candies tries to hide in the corner, hoping they won't be noticed, only for the balls to notice them after brutally murdering the bird once again.

Soon, the balls were trapped in the small area, paving its way to the next level with four balls!

Horrified by this, the bird begins to bang on the computer screen and yell, "Hey, get me out of here! I beg of you, please!" before getting pounded by the four balls, leaving a red stain smeared all over the screen.

In spite of this, the balls were later trapped, leading to a screen with five balls bouncing all over the area. With that, the bird flies to where the candies are huddled and said, "Guys, please don't let these bastards kill me again, it's killing me to death!"

Seconds later, the balls pounds the bird to death.

The whole thing would go on for several more levels until the screen became clogged up.

"Bye bye birdy!" the orange haired girl grins as she then resurrects the bird to kill him again.

"Kihihihihi!"

Meanwhile in Hong Kong, Cuttlefish was playing the game _Flappy Bird_ when Kei walks in and said, "What the hell are you doing?"

Cuttlefish tries to hide the cellphone behind the back before Kei snatches it from him.

"First there's that _Angry Birds_ hype, now this? What the hell is this rubbish? You keep on pressing the same button so the bird can stay up and try to avoid the pipes from the game my son plays, do you realize how stupid this is? If you want to fly, you might as well go up to the roof and flap your arms trying to avoid hitting the wires while squawking like an escaped mental patient!"

"And while you're at it, you can start shitting right on top of people's heads!"

Cuttlefish swipes his cellphone back and said, "You could calm down since neither of us have to worry about the sagging business that happened over a decade ago and even then you're still tense, didn't your mother-in-law tell you-"

"This isn't your business and it wasn't my fault that the place got crowded during the day, causing my wife to live with her mother! Also remember that my son has to go to the university in the U.S., what am I supposed to do? What was he supposed to do?" Kei snapped.

"Still, you haven't been doing much to try to contact them, how do you think they would feel?" said Cuttlefish.

Annoyed, Kei throws the cellphone at his employee, only for Cuttlefish to dodge it and said, "Now you're throwing things at people, is that how you treat your employees lately? Even though it wasn't as bad as that run in I had with that foreigner years ago, who the hell throws his employee's cellphone at someone?"

Kei then chases after Cuttlefish who runs out of the restaurant before proceeding to rapidly flap his arms, enabling him to get away from the wrath of his stressed out boss.

Kei looks on and said, "How did he do that?"

Later, somewhere in the alternate universe, Uso pilots his mecha into one of strongholds of the Zanscare Empire, the young pilot encounter one of the most bizarre things he have ever seen in his life...an army of bikini-clad women armed with bazookas. The sight confuses the young boy who then said, "What is going on here? Is it an illusion? I have to be dreaming...how can this be? What is going on here?"

Uso continues to panic as the bikini women begins to attack the _Victory 2 Gundam_, causing the boy to freak out even further as he starts swinging the beam saber in a random direction, killing the bikini army.

Soon, a flapping bird appears out of nowhere and was also hit by the beam saber, vaporizing it.

Once it was over, Uso gasp for breath and said, "This can't be for real, what's going on here?"

Katejina Loos, a psychotic bitch became enraged and said, "Rats! I thought that army of bikini women would work!"

"Looks like I'll have to kill him myself!"

In the end, thanks to his surge of powers that rivals that of Kamille Bidan's in the war against the titans, Uso Ewin was able to defeat Katejina and the Zanscare Empire. The cost of the war includes both of Uso's parents, the entire Shrike Team, his friend Shakti's mother, countless lives of the civilians who got caught in the crossfire, Reinforce Jr., a group of old men who took part in the resistance, and Odelo.

All was well as Uso prepares to settle down with Shakti when suddenly, an ancient mecha lands out of nowhere and a old man emerged from the cockpit.

"Who are you?" Uso asked.

The old man said, "I'm Judau Asht-er...I mean...I'm...what was that again? Oh yeah, it's Grey Stroke!"

"Grey Stroke? I heard about you...you're the guy leading the resistance against the Jupiter Empire!" Uso yelled.

"That's right, I heard about your exploits and how you helped bring down the Zanscare Empire, in times like this, our resistance could really use your help, what do you say?"

Uso sighs and said, "I'll go and get my Gundam, but first...I have to do something." as he begins to walk to his home.

"Okay, take your time." said Judau.

As he enter the room, Uso stands in front of a makeshift shrine where a maggot infested blood soaked helmet have been placed and said, "Mom...I will be going away for a while and don't worry...Shakti still haven't found out."

"But don't worry, just a little longer...a little longer...once it's over, we can finally be together...I can get a nice boat and we can spend time together like we used to, hehehe...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"


End file.
